The Bandido Trail

By W.A. "Bill" Daniels (Po8)

 

Regarding the events at Bandido Flats in the Year of Our Lord 2005

 

Come gather round cowboys, I’ll tell you a tale,

Bout fourteen desperados on the Bandido trail.

They rode from the South and the East and the West,

To ride those fast ponies, their courage to test.

 

There was Terry the Wild Woman Walsh with us riding,

Tippidoe Joan who was Cajuns deriding,

Michael who goes by the handle “150,”

Patrick “The Warden” whose key ring is nifty.

 

Doc Miller who stitches us up when we bust,

Wilkie, who after Doc Miller doth lust,

A voice in the distance says Charles is in charge,

Riding close by is Colorado Marg.

 

Big Paul astride a big mount from Missouri,

Little Gus, his sidekick, don’t seem in no hurry.

Cause those pine trees reach tall and they’re touching the sky,

While Koa the Hound Dog helps keep black bears nigh.

 

Our Gretchen is fetchin’ in her usual style.

And sweet blue-eyed Mar-G will give you a smile,

Saying “sample my coffee it’s hot and its free,

But you best help with the chores or I’ll duct tape you to a tree.”

 

Billy the Po8 and Lyden was seen.

Laurie the Wrangler was lookin’ so clean.

Lee’s got a new pickup, not much ‘neath the hood,

“Just cause 50,000 flies like it don’t make dog sh*t good.”

 

Now if you weren’t there then I guess you can’t guess,

Bout the cure for “Chap Fever” and other such mess.

Yes you would have missed Paul take his shower in the breeze,

(We believe it’s his habit to show off his knees.)

 

And you would have missed thunder and storm clouds and lightning,

That came in so close and to horses was frightening,

But us brave desperados neath trees we did hide,

And we wasn’t scairt and luck-i-ly wasn’t fried.

 

So we rode up the mountain and rode down the draw,

Talking bout critters and country, but not never of law.

We wuz fourteen desperados, we’ll go back again.

Cause those ridin’ fast ponies are them we call “friend.”